image borrowed from bing
Shave & a Haircut
“The best reason I can think of for not running for President,
is that I’d have to shave twice a day.”--Adlai Stevenson.
1(sound cue) harmonica lullaby.
--Barber: I’m Barnes, what’s your pleasure?
--Hunter: I’m Buck, a shave & a haircut would be much
3(medium shot) Barnes checks a red kettle on a pot bellied stove
behind them; it’s steaming. He is a tall man with wide shoulders
and large hands, with an erect posture, balding with a shiny pate,
wearing a thick salt & pepper mustache with mutton chops, a short
white barber’s jacket & an orange bow tie.
4(medium close-up) Barnes lays out three chrome pairs of scissors,
and two straight razors--then commenced to strop a thick leather
5(sound cue) the sound of a straight razor blade slapping against
the scarred leather.
6(medium close-up) Buck props up the Sharps against a small table,
still within reach, then thumps his black hat on a sideboard; part of
a china cabinet with a marvelous collection of pocket watches in it.
--Buck: kind of warm in here with that stove--mind if I open the door
--Barnes: sure, kick her open, it’s a fine morning.
8(sound cue) piano & violin.
9(medium shot) Buck opens the door as the two cow bells
10(close-up) Buck whistles shrilly.
11(medium wide shot) Cheewa slides silently into the shop, & lies
down under the table, watching the street.
--Barnes: I don’t hold much with dogs in my shop, mister.
--Buck: he’ll mind his manners; he won’t mess up your sawdust
13(hold the two-shot) angle on the barber over Buck’s shoulder;
--Barnes: what if another customer comes in?
--Buck: he never bites unless I tell him to.
14(mediuim close-up) Cheewa curls up a lip & growls.
15(close-up) Barnes setting his jaw in resignation.
16(medium two-shot) Barnes latches a barber’s striped apron
around Buck’s neck, then pours out hot water from the red
kettle into a brown ceramic bowl; dips then wrings out a
17(sound cue) banjo & accordion.
18(tight two-shot) Buck closes his eyes as the barber places
the steaming cloth on his face.
--Barnes: I don’t like dogs.
--Buck: don’t tell him that--he’s very sensitive.
19(medium two-shot) Barnes begins trimming Buck’s long
thick hair with a shiny pair of scissors.
--Barnes: what was all that shooting about, up the street
a while ago?
20(medium close-up) Barnes is massaging Buck’s face through
the hot towel;
--Buck: couple of fellas took to scuffling over one of the ladies
at the CHINA DOLL.
21(tight two-shot) Barnes lifts off the hot towel, & Buck’s
beard is sparkling & steaming.
--Barnes: anyone get hurt?
--Buck: one of the bully guards got himself shot.
22(medium two-shot) the barber picks up two pairs of scissors
& returns to cutting hair.
23(sound cue) scissors snipping & clacking:
--Barnes: which one?
--Buck: the big ugly one.
24(tight two shot) angle on
--Barnes: Ramos? I hope to hell it was Ramos.
--Buck: we didn’t get around to exchanging handles.
25(sound cue) blues guitar double slide.
--Barnes; so you were there? did you get in on any of
--Buck: I was there.
27( open up wide shot) cut to angle behind the men, with
the black dog still watching the street:
--Barnes: I heard some glass shattering before the shots;
damn place is a chamber of horrors, it ought be torched.
--Buck: did you say chamber of whores?
--Buck: I been in worse.
28(sound cue) saloon piano.
--Barnes: couple of men a week get killed or crippled
in that pusshole.
--Buck: doesn’t this chickenshit town still have a sheriff?
31(sound cue) soft guitar strumming.
--Barnes: oh yeah, we got ourselves a sheriff, Joe Hopp--
wears a tin badge, has a deputy, locks drunks up in his
jail & everything.
33(cut to medium wide shot) Barnes is silent, trimming now
on Buck’s skunk-striped beard.
--Barnes: but nothing, it is Cash Bronson that runs this town.
Joe Hopp is very aware of the dozen gunslingers Bronson
employs--& if he ever meddled into the goings-on at the
CHINA DOLL, Bronson would squash him like a cockroach,
wiping his brains off the boot like it was cow shit.
35( two-shot) angle on
--Buck: so Bronson makes the law here?
--Barnes: I didn’t say that; it has nothing to do with the law--
it has everything to do with the power.
--Buck: what the fuck--there’s a Bronson in every town.
Posted over at dVerse Poets OLN134
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