Thursday, January 21, 2016

Blackthorne--Scene 53

image from wet


Cinemagenic Fifty-Three

Red Riders

“The intruders know who we are and saw that
our house is full.”--Ray Jarosz.

1(overhead wide drone shot) angle over the top of the five riders,
300 yards out from the camp site, moving fast.
2(sound cue) coronet & snare drum.
3(tighten the shot--in slow motion) the tracking across broad horse’s
rumps, muscles rippling, tails high, then back across the broad
shoulders of the mysterious riders.
4(cut to medium wide-shot) the lip of a small rise, angle on a hawk
perched atop some tall sage.
5(sound cue) horse’s hooves.
6(hold the shot) as the riders emerge over the rim with swirling dust
rolling over them, just as the hawk burst into flight.
7(sound cue) hawk’s cry, lots of leather creaking, pounding hooves
over kettle drum.
8(cut to two-shot) Buck & Johnny, their stiff backs to the camera, facing
the oncoming horde.
9(tight two-shot) angle on Johnny: Cocked & loaded, boss.
Buck: Fucking boy rowdy.
10(sound cue) fire popping, dog growling over slide guitar riff.
11(cut to wide shot) as the riders come in full gallop, the sun rising
behind them, their faces in red shadow. They pulled up hard & fast
as their horses snorted, nickered, & pranced-- heaving & steaming.
12(close-up) Buck’s eyes, sizing them up.
13(close-up) Johnny, recognizing all of them, his eyes hardening.
14(voice-over) Buck: The honcho in front has to be Bronson.
15(medium one-shot) The man sat on a golden palomino. His gear
was ornate, not unlike Buck’s--with wide silver-studded stirrups, chest
halter & skirts. He wore a wide-brimmed white hat, with the sides rolled
up perfectly, a stark white shirt that was now alkaline dust smeared, a
thick leather string tie pulled through a silver stallion-head bolo, a weath-
ered dark leather vest, tight brown denims & fancy knee-high well-
polished boots, complete with cruel silver spurs, the rowels still spinning.
16(sound cue) strident piano & huffing harmonica.
17(medium close-up) A .44 Smith & Wessen hung on his left hip, a gentle-
man’s weapon, with carved ivory handle inserts--not made for driving nails
or cracking skulls. Perfect white buckskin gloves covered his small hands. 
He was a big man, nearly as tall as Buck, but heavier, sporting a merchant’s
thick mid-section & pasty pale skin. He was clean shaven, had thick eyebrows,
soot onyx eyes & a prominent Patrician’s nose. 
18(voice-over) Buck: They’d be the gunsels.
19(widen the shot) on Bronson’s left, three wire-thin wranglers
leaned forward over their wide Mexican pommels, their narrowed
eyes jumpy, all in dusty hats, one in a brown sombrero, stovepipe
chaps & old boots--their calloused hands resting on their saddles,
waiting for orders. Two of them were old-timers, wearing vintage
Colt .45’s, with gray stubble on their chins & skin burned dark
from honest labor. One was a kid, in an Eastern derby, with blond 
peach fuzz on his rosy cheeks, wearing a long-barreled Navy 
Colt .36.
20(sound cue) French horns & cello.
21(close-up) Buck looks to the right.
22(cut to the right) angle on a very tall lean fellow on a coal
gelding, whose icy green eyes waited for Buck to notice him.
He wore a prominent gun belt buckle, pounded gold with a silver
“B” in the center, Buck was aware of his tenseness, coiled like
a compressed spring. His horse moved, but he didn’t.
23(close-up) the man’s intense green eyes never leaving Buck’s.
24(widen the shot) His right hand was gloveless, the shirt sleeve
folded back once, his long fingers hovering over a Lightning Colt .38
that was snugly tied down to his right leg--a self-cocker like Buck’s
Thunderer. He wore a black hat with the front folded up slightly,
a lizard skin hat band, a snug-fitting yellow Mexican silk shirt, a 
large black neckerchief draped out over his right shoulder, gray
pin-striped pants tucked into his boots.
25(close-up) He had a thin face, with long dark hair, & a well-
trimmed mustache & swath under his lower lip, darkish circles
under his piercing eyes.
26(voice-over) Buck: Now this piece of work has to be Thor.
27(wide-shot) the riders sitting tense, their horses side-stepping,
neighing & lifting a front leg while swishing their tails. An awkward 
minute passed as
28(the camera pans) from Thor past Bronson to the wranglers.
29(cut to two-shot) Buck & the Eagle more than ready.

              Finally someone spoke.

Glenn Buttkus

Posted over at dVerse Poets Pub OLN


Mary said...

Love the detail you include as the saga continues!

Pleasant Street said...

Ahhh you left us wanting more as usual!

I can just smell the leather and the horses and the shit. Can't wait for the next

brudberg said...

Oh the descriptions of them... you can feel their identity their values in what they wear... and now you keep us waiting for what they'll be saying... tense my friend...

De said...

Love the sounds here, Glenn. You took me there.

Sanaa Rizvi said...

Love how the saga unfolds itself with time :D great write :D

Anonymous said...

The thought of leather and horses are remarkable and wow!!!

You have us wanting more to read in your next sage.

I love this incredible poem. You Glenn are a true visionary.


Georgina Wright said...

What a screenplay and poem. Moves fast.

Bodhirose said...

A cliffhanger!

Kate Mia said...

WeLL.. sounds liKe
peRhaps thE
Wild and
Free Appaloosa
iS now changing
into Thor upon
a horse.. at
least in
my imag
set free..
sinG free
upOn ride
oF wiLd horSes..:)

Scarlet said...

What a tense moment and you left us all hanging Glenn ~ Love the details of the guests and music background ~

Looking forward to the next chapter ~ Happy week/end ~


Anonymous said...

Such an amazing amount of detail.. the whole scene just popped up in front of my eyes. Loved it.

Toni Spencer said...

So many details, sounds....loving horses and riding as I do, I would just smell the leather saddles, horses...and then you leave us dangling! Perfectway to keep an audience enthralled and coming back for more.

Marina Sofia said...

Oooh, you left us on a cliffhanger! I can really visualise the scene and hear and smell it too, thanks to your detailed descriptions. Tense, indeed... You make me want to watch an old cowboy film, I haven't seen one in years!

kaykuala said...

the riders sitting tense, their horses side-stepping,
neighing & lifting a front leg while swishing their tails

Very vivid description of man and animals. The Blackthorne series will always whet the appetite for more. Very detailed and very rare cowboy stories given your treatment Glenn!

Hank said...

You had me from the beginning :
"the tracking across broad horse’s
rumps, muscles rippling, tails high, then back across the broad
shoulders of the mysterious riders."
Amazing description.........okay......Take Two -- I want to know what happens next!!! You will write the next act, right?

Victoria said...

Great sensual details in this, Glenn--especially related to the senses of hearing and smell.