Monday, October 14, 2013

Blackthorne--Scene Ten

image borrowed from bing


Cinemagenic Ten


“The beauty of independence, departure, actions
that rely on themselves.”--Walt Whitman

1(medium close-up) the past: a large barn owl perched on
a bale of hay in the loft.
2(sound cue) an owl hooting, fading to Indian branch flute.
3(medium wide-shot) barn loft doors wide open, witnessing
a sunrise, & the figure of a young man approaching. 
4(sound cue) rooster crowing, chickens clucking, one duck
quacking mixed in, juice harp thwacking.
5(medium shot) young Buck striding toward the barn, reverse
dolly moving away from him, carrying a burlap sack of provisions
in his left hand, and a long-barrel Winchester in the other. 
6(sound cue) screen door closing, then morning cicadas chirping.
7(medium wide shot) Buck walks past the camera, out of the frame,
camera dollies-in to the ranch house front porch.
8(medium close up ) Bear Woman standing on the porch, holding
little Jack.
9(close-up) her tear-stained face, silent sullen look.
10(sound cue) piano & pioneer fiddling.
11(cut to medium shot) interior of the barn as young Buck enters,
walks up to one of the stalls, leans his sack & the rifle against the
wall, grabs a colorful halter from the tack peg, & enters the stall.
12(sound cue) horse nickering, low & soft. 
13(2-shot) Buck in the stall with a midnight black gelding.
14(medium close-up) he struggles to slip the halter over the horse’s
head, as it shakes away twice.
15(sound cue) six-string guitar, double slide.
16(2-shot) Buck: Easy Blackie. This is the day--we’re leaving.
17(cut to medium shot) a very old collie limps into the barn, its muzzle
pure gray, its eyes cloudy with cataract, then lies down near the stall.
18(sound cue) dog whining 4 times, & then on the beat a saxophone
bleating 4 more times.
19(medium wide-shot) Buck leads the gelding out of the stall, stops
by the dog, crouches onto his knees, & pets the dog’s head. 
20(sound cue) dog barks once hoarsely. 
21(2 shot) collie licks Buck’s hand as he strokes the dog’s head.
22Buck: Hey, I’ll miss you too, King. You take care of the place,
& watch over Jackie.
23(medium wide-shot) Buck stands up, puts a red horse blanket
on the big black, then tosses up a well-worn saddle.
24(sound cue) metal clinking, one hoof rapping, leather
25(hold medium shot) watching Buck finishing the saddling,
then slipping the old Winchester into a scabbard, before
tying the sack on top of his saddle bags. 
26(sound cue) harmonica & sweet violin strains.
27(cut to reverse wide-shot) the back of the Indian woman,
with young Buck approaching leading the horse.
28(cut to reverse medium-shot) Buck’s POV stopping in front
of Bear Woman & the crying infant. He ties off the horse at
a railing.
29(3 shot) Buck hugs the woman, then kisses his little brother
on top of his fussing head.
30( sound cue) harmonica, with guitar strumming.
31(close-up) Bear Woman: You are 17--you leave as a man,
but where will you go?
32(2-shot) Buck points off to toward the West: out there, onto
the prairie to hunt buffalo.
33Bear Woman: Your father still needs you here--we all need you.
34Buck: Dad finds what he needs in a bottle. I just have to light
out of here before I go crazy or hurt the old man. There is nothing
left between us now.
35(close-up) Bear Woman: when will you return?
36(close-up) Buck, holds in silence for a 2 count: when the hate
is gone from my heart.
37(sound cue) Indian snake rattle fading into buffalo hooves
38(2-shot) Bear Woman: will the killing of Ptaysanwee heal
your hate?
39Buck: Maybe, there is a whole wide world out there, & I need
to be swallowed up by it.
40(sound cue) banjo & mandolin. 
41Bear Woman: then go young Buck, and may you find good
medicine in the bloody sea of grass. 
42(cut to medium wide-shot) Buck mounts up, spins the gelding
around facing West, touches the brim of his battered hat, kicks
the black’s sides & gallops off. 
43(cut to Loman truck crane shot) Buck riding toward the camera.
44(close-up) Buck’s face, dry-eyed, brows knitted.
45(hold the crane shot) as Buck rides out of the frame.
46(sound cue) horse galloping, dog barking, violin strains.
47(cut to medium close-up) Bear Woman on the porch with infant.
48(close-up) child waving: bye-bye, bye-bye. 

Glenn Buttkus

October 2013

Posted over on dVerse Poets OLN118

Would you like to hear the author read this Cinemagenic poem to you?


Brian Miller said...

when the hate is gone from my heart...that def takes a bit of time...nice back story piece filling in the why is he here now...with nothing to come home to...

Mary said...

Very powerful scene of leaving... The young man is now setting off on his own. Strong writing, Glenn. Tugs at my emotions.

Glenn Buttkus said...

Home is both illusion & emotion; part of the answer to your question, Brian, will come in next weeks offering: Elegy.

Claudia said...

leaving is always tough but sometimes there's no other choice...esp. when hate is in the mix.. my heart aches though..

Björn said...

Oh this was strong.. the bloody grass.. Killing Buffalo.. you sure keep us in tension here Glenn... and so sorry for the linky...

Anonymous said...

A very vivid scene. I loved- "Buck: Maybe, there is a whole wide world out there, & I need
to be swallowed up by it."

It has all the necessary emotions and that thirst for adventure.

I wonder why you have not included the shot 31.


Glenn Buttkus said...

Thanks, HA; just screwed the pooch on the count; will need to rectify it; nice catch.

Anonymous said...

Sounds like a Ford film. For some reason The Searchers came to mind. Maybe it was the 'bloody sea of grass.' Good filmimng Glenn. >KB

Anna Chamberlain said...

This hits close to home. I left my younger brother (he's only 3 years younger though) with my dad when I was 17. I had been working full time for a year to help support him and my dysfunctional, broken father. I had to extricate myself before my father swallowed me whole. I ended up having to work full time for another year to start my adventure at college. I lived on a couch in someone's one bedroom apartment and while I cannot honestly claim hate I sure had a lot of resentment.

Beachanny said...

Wow Glenn - this is quite an epic. I suppose there are many precedents for this - but a poetic screenplay is quite a feat. I envy your courage and imagination.

Glenn Buttkus said...

Gay, the term "cinemagenic" was something I bumped into years ago, but the poetry was written by a poet who seem to know nothing about screenplays, or how movies are made. Understand an actual "screenplay" is a bare-bones outline. My own touch is to create the entire film in words, including everything seen & heard; and that's never been done before; thus I claim the form.

mrs mediocrity said...

such a poignant end to this scene... loving these vignettes all adding up to the full story, you do a great job of making us "see" it!

Glenn Buttkus said...

In kind of a cool way, my Cinemagenic poems are making dVerse into a Pulp magazine out of the 30's-40's, in which, like the great serializations of Zane Gray & Edgar Rice Burroughs, my "movie", based on my unpublished "novel" is revealed one scene at a time. If we can keep the interest up (so far, so good--everybody loves a Western), I could easily sew up my OLN slots for many months to come.

Katie said...

Great poem, again! I love this story! :-)

Mystic_Mom said...

You are creating something so epic here Glenn. Amazing images and a true to the culture feel. Well done my friend, well done.