image from wildwings.com
Blackthorne
Cinemagenic Sixty
Closure
“Closure is bullshit.”--James Ellroy.
1(sound cue) piano & violin.
2(medium close-up) Buck: Oh yes, I assure you that
we do have some unfinished business.
3(medium wide-shot) behind Buck & the Eagle.
Bronson & the three wranglers were now mounted,
but Thor still stood next to his mount, the raw anger
evident in his brows & forehead.
4(crane three-shot) Thor, Buck, & Johnny--all were
standing like pugnacious ramrods.
5(sound cue) French horn & jazz brushing.
6(two-shot) Bronson leaning in toward Thor: Come
on, brother. Plant that skinny butt of yours in saddle
leather.
7(medium close-up) Thor: Cash, I really don’t like
this raggedy-assed pair of trouble-makers.
8(two-shot) Buck & the Eagle reciprocating the
negativity.
9(close-up) Bronson : Hell, you don’t like anybody.
Come on, shake a boot.
10(medium close-up) Thor stiffly stepped up onto his
black, his eyes like coal: I’ll be seeing you, Mr. Buck.
You two are a couple of lucky assholes today.
11(sound cue) saxophone & tambourine.
12(two-shot) Buck, over Thor’s shoulder, through a
smirk: I think the lady french-kissed us all.
13(two-shot) Bronson spun his Palomino around,
flashing a stern look at his brother; I said, let’s ride.
14(medium wide-shot) Thor responded by rowelling
his black mount into an immediate full gallop.
15(close-up) Bronson spiked his silver spurs into the
golden sides of his stallion
16(sound cue) fast guitar strumming.
17(overhead crane medium wide-shot) The old
wrangler started off next--the two ropes looped around
Chatawa’s neck were double-lashed to his saddle-horn.
The dappled stud strained & struggled against the lead.
The other two pokes took up the rear, riding off without
looking back.
18(stationary medium wide shot) 200 yards beyond
the camp as we see the Bronsons galloping hard
toward the lens--with Thor barely in the lead.
19(sound cue) pounding horse’s hooves over a
clarinet.
20(hold the stationary shot) as Thor & Cash fill up
the frame with their gallop-then ride over the top of it
21(overhead drone shot) tracking with the strung-out
five riders.
22(medium close-up) Cheewa chasing after the two
drag riders barking & nipping at their horses hooves.
23(reverse two shot) Buck and Johnny, backs to the
camera, standing and watching as the bellicose
bunch were far enough away that they traveled on
silent hooves, the steeds being swallowed up by a
rust-gray dust cloud.
24(sound cue) Indian seed rattle & blues guitar riff.
25( jump-cut to) a pair of prairie dogs, craning their
necks watching the wranglers depart.
26(sound cue) big angry dog barking over branch
flute.
Glenn Buttkus
Posted over at dVerse Poets Pub OLN
14 comments:
Great tension in that parting... it's like a keg of powder ready to explode. I look forward to a meeting on a place more fair than this... I'm already looking forward to the next installment
Wow the details are just fantastic!
I agree, the level of tension and excitement was most tangible here! I too am awaiting the next installment❤️
It doesn't feel like closure...I think much more is to come. I love reading all the details that you add to these scenes, Glenn. I can hear it when that Indian seed rattle sounds.
Hi Glenn, had trouble reading your poem, due to one of my learning disabilities, which prevented me, from tracking this. What I was able to read, before I got lost, in your poem, is the masterful building of suspense, to the reader, with the tightness of your verses.
The music, sound of hooves, dogs barking...leave us hanging in the saddle of suspense!
“Closure is bullshit.”--James Ellroy - this is such a good quote, short and to the point, and I agree with it. I love the phrase 'all were standing like pugnacious ramrods'! Those sound effects add so much to the tension.
Skilfully done Glenn - your writing is always so sharp and confident..
I admire the quote, sounds, galloping horses,and ending shot of the steeds being swallowed up by a rust-gray dust cloud. Good chapter Glenn ~
I have never read anything like this before and I loved it.
I have a blue corn rattle I bought at a pow wow - so the image of the rattle is very strong for me and of course I have to enjoy a blues guitar riff. You really have a talent of bringing music and visuals to life in your words. Most enjoyable tonight :)
I came over to read your installment.
Uh-oh, this sounds like an ending... hope you take it seriously that closure is nonsense and never closure!
With memory nothing is ever closed. We just get breaks from our emotional attachment to it. I think you built up the tension well between these people and made us realize that the tension will not be released.
This was like a movie! I enjoyed it.
Post a Comment