Kerouac

KEROUAC

by Janet Hamill


I had nothing but I had a grey tee shirt

I ironed on black velvet letters
KEROUAC

I had nothing I had four walls on St. Marks Place
a bottle of Calvados and the silence of the universe
I had nothing
but I had you
From sea to shining sea
east to west north to south
Atlantic Pacific Arctic Antarctic Indian Ocean
and the eighth mar incognito
over under inside and out
beyond everything

I had you
I had words lines and paragraphs rushing down mountain
sides high above the timberline
from Desolation Peak to 242 choruses of blues
for the Buddha and fellaheen of Mexico City
and every other place
I had your footprints on the beach in Tangiers
your palm print on the wheel of impermanence
your dreams of long childhood walks under the old trees
of New England your athlete’s body your flannel shirts
your handsome face on the fire escape on E. 7th Street
just before the invocation of Duluoz
inhaling one last Lucky Strike
for the pent-up aching restless road
farewell subterraneans and water towers of Manhattan
it was time for all that coming back to America
the Lincoln Tunnel oil tanks and anemic skies in New Jersey
Route 80 over the Delaware the road unraveling
the road sufficient unto itself
a twentieth-century pilgrim’s way
a home for the tathagata passing through the railroad earth
the gas station night
the bebop radio wail of Charlie Parker’s saxophone
clear across Kansas
to San Francisco the little alley off Market Street
Tokay in a paper bag at the mouth of Bixby Canyon
Big Sur’s ocean roar of vowel sounds
from the far side of eternity
waves laying better than a thousand transcendental
diamonds of compassion at your feet
even to the end I had you
to the maenads of fame tearing you to pieces
in the glow of a television set in Florida
to what‘s buried in Lowell’s Edson Cemetary
Ti Jean nothing’s buried there
the dust of your sacred bleeeding Catholic heart
with that of the holy ghost
and certain mad and driven saints
has been placed among the stars
I had nothing but I had a grey tee shirt
And I ironed on black velvet letter

KEROUAC


Janet Hamill