Sunday, February 26, 2012

Cheez Almighty

image borrowed from bing

Cheez Almighty

Cheez, cheez,
Oh Jeez;
do you think our Savior
liked any kind of Cheez
on his unleavened bread?
Dude had all kinds of wine,
so why not the Cheez?

And then there was Lincoln,
who it is said
scarfed down a fried peanut butter
and Cheez sandwich
before he took his seat
in the balcony of Ford’s Theater,
waiting to have his skull

Even Attila,
the nasty Hun,
turned back his mighty horde
from the massive gates
of Rome
because the wily pope
gave him several hundred pounds
of Cheez.

I read where
Lewis told Clark
to chew cascara bark
to alleviate a severe case of constipation
brought on strong
and fully induced by the over ingestion
of Native American Cheez.

You know
Superman and Batman
do hang out at Palmer’s Pizza joint
in Gotham,
where Supe gobbles
Cheez Whizz sundaes,
and the Bat
craves and consumes the hot sausage
stinky Cheez calzone.

Cheez is cool,
when it’s not hot,
stretching out two feet
from plate to lip.
Either way,
dig it while your colon
is still Cheez friendly.

Glenn Buttkus

February 2012

Listed as #26 over at Magpie Tales 106

Would you like to hear the author read this poem to you?


Brian Miller said...

while your colon is still cheez friendly...ha...a PB and cheez sammy...really? hmm...that might have a texture problem for me...dip it in soup and make it soft...smiles...nice write man

Kathe W. said...

very cool write- souper as a matter of fact!

Linda said...

The first time I have experienced a historical look at cheese consumption. Interesting. Usually the history is in the production. The only person I know with an aversion to cheese is my doctor who monitors my cholesterol. I enjoyed your poem, Glenn. Thanks for sharing.

Dave King said...

Total enjoyment. Canned pleasure, you might say. I read it several times, just for the hell of it.

Doctor FTSE said...

BUt what would life be without a little cheez. I mean, what would happen to photographs . . .

fraopti pubmil

Oh, sorry, Glen. I'm a robot and I've typed the wretched illegible WV's in the wrong place. Could you do all bloggers a favour by turning them off in your dashboard so we don;t have to waste quite so much time trying to figure them out? Much ta.

izzy said...

Grilled cheese and tomato ! YUM!

Jaggerfan1 said...

You've been nominated for an award! Check my blog!!

Tess Kincaid said...

Cheezes! What a write!

Wander said...

This was funny...


robkistner said...

a wonderful celebration of butt putty... :)

Anonymous said...

cheese - cholesterol / lactose problems -

buy organic cheese or organic vegan cheese, especially almond soy cheese......

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