Pawning Yesterday

image borrowed from brian miller

Pawning yesterday, for today, in hope of tomorrow


do you know how many times
i go looking for a CD, song stuck
in my head, realizing it was in the collection
i hocked, the year i thought, "fuck
what have i gotten us into?"

i don't miss the golf clubs my parents bought
for Christmas, returned the next week, to keep
the lights on, i was a hack anyway
and probably would have wrapped one
around a tree when i missed a crucial
(to me only) shot

& perusing the pawn shop today
guitars, glitter and games all hang
tags like the ones toed at the morgue,
dead memories walking, i am anxious again
remembering desperation's fingers
twist of my spine as i was learning to lose,
being broke & and the lines
on all its various faces

there is not much left
there is not much left, but

52.4 billion was spent this weekend
by Americans in Black Friday shopping
for tomorrow's bankrupt masquerade,
but i refuse the mask,

and if i can't find the song, hell, we been here
before, i'll just hum along as we slow dance
in the tree glow, knowing i got everything i need

merry Christmas, to you
merry Christmas, to me


Brian Miller

Posted over on his site Way Station One
Listed as #5 over on dVerse Poets--Open Link Night